The Virgin will conceive and give birth to a son and they will call Him Emmanuel, a name which means ‘God is with us’.
In the final week of Advent the Church naturally focuses on the figure of the Mother. But every third year, the Church bowls us a bit of googly when the Sunday Gospel isn’t primarily about Our Lady. It concerns Joseph. Unlike Luke, Matthew describes the birth of Jesus and the events leading up to it from Joseph’s perspective.
And that’s fine. Our Lady doesn’t mind. After all, excepting only Our Lord, Joseph was the most precious person in her life. And we need this male perspective. Joseph shows us the importance of a father figure – biological fathers, and also adoptive fathers and all those who fulfil the role of a male mentor in the life of a child.
“Before they came to live together she was found to be with child.” That’s a massive problem in the world of ancient Judaism with its emphasis on purity and honour. Most men would have backed off. Joseph had the option of enforcing legal sentence against Mary, having her stoned to death. He didn’t. “Being a man of honour and wanting to spare her publicity [Joseph] decided to divorce her informally.”
Our society prides itself on being so tolerant, and yet, when we feel personally wronged, we become hyper-sensitive. We insist so loudly upon our rights. Joseph encourages us not to jump to conclusions. At first sight, the evidence may seem to point in a certain direction. The reality may be very different – as it was with the paternity of Jesus. Be patient, don’t rush to conclusions, be willing to listen to what the other person has to say. Like Mary, they may be right.
The better view is that Joseph didn’t misjudge the situation; he trusted Mary. The better translation of today’s Gospel is: “Joseph, being a holy man and not wanting to reveal her mystery, resolved to withdraw from her quietly.” Joseph didn’t contemplate divorcing Mary, he didn’t doubt her. Rather, he was so much in awe of her, and the mystery she carried, that he felt unworthy to remain with her. Conscious of his own failings, Joseph offered to withdraw from the presence of pure holiness and goodness.
Whichever the scenario, the underlying message is this: Joseph didn’t walk away. He stepped up to the mark and accepted the responsibilities which presented themselves to him. No, it wasn’t easy. Yes, he probably had to wrestle with the situation and the circumstances, but he did what was right. And he did it without fuss, without casting aspersions or blame on others. Joseph brought God into the equation. He allowed God to have His say in the matter, and, when God made His will known, Joseph acted it on it promptly – without delay, without complaint. “He took his wife to his home.”
One of the greatest problems we face today is the failure to accept responsibilities, especially when they involve lifelong commitments such as marriage and children. We know our rights, we fight to preserve our freedom and our independence at all costs. We don’t allow others to infringe upon that, even when it means walking away from the consequences of our actions.
In doing so, it isn’t just others we are failing. We are failing ourselves. We remain immature and selfish; we never grow to the greatness of which, with God’s grace, we are capable. Human maturity comes from taking on, honouring, commitments – yes, even, with the challenges which accompany them. We grow through the experience. In avoiding commitments, we remain infantile.
It’s a temptation to say, “I’m not ready for the commitment of marriage and children.” Trust God. Open your heart to Him in prayer. Ask Him to reveal His will to you. And when He does, act upon it promptly and without complaining. Marry in church to receive the grace of the sacrament of Matrimony which enables us to do the things we doubt we are humanly capable of.
And men especially, learn from the example of Joseph. Ask for his prayers for help to do the right thing, the loving thing. Today’s world would have told Joseph to walk away from the situation. Thank God he didn’t. He took into his home the purest woman who ever lived; he became the foster father of the world’s Redeemer.
So certainly, we join Our Lady in our final spiritual preparations for Christmas. We thank her for her “Yes” to “the message of an Angel”. But we also say: “Blessed be St Joseph, her spouse most chaste.”
This homily was preached at the Church of the Holy Ghost & St Stephen, Shepherd’s Bush, West London, on the Fourth Sunday of Advent 2022
Areas of Catholic Herald business are still recovering post-pandemic.
However, we are reaching out to the Catholic community and readership, that has been so loyal to the Catholic Herald. Please join us on our 135 year mission by supporting us.
We are raising £250,000 to safeguard the Herald as a world-leading voice in Catholic journalism and teaching.
We have been a bold and influential voice in the church since 1888, standing up for traditional Catholic culture and values. Please consider donating.